


The misadventures of drunk Alec Lightwood

by katychan666



Series: The drunk adventures of Malec [3]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Based on a Tumblr Post, Crack, M/M, drunk!Alec
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-10
Updated: 2018-01-10
Packaged: 2019-03-03 04:19:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13333356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katychan666/pseuds/katychan666
Summary: Alec gets drunk and Magnus needs to deal with his drunken ass xD.(Based on Tumblr post)





	The misadventures of drunk Alec Lightwood

**Author's Note:**

> Based on this Tumblr post: http://dontrainonmymalec.tumblr.com/post/160438817196/alec-i-didnt-drink-that-much-last-night-jace
> 
> Another crack fic :D. This was written during master's seminar class, because I was bored as hell and was scrolling through Tumblr, saw the mentioned post and was inspired :) (aren't I a good student? xD)
> 
> I hope it's funny?
> 
> Enjoy~

Magnus, Alec and the hunter’s friends were currently at the Pandemonium, having a few drinks after the last week, which was filled with many difficult missions, so letting loose on the weekend seemed like a good idea to all of them, even Alec expressed the wish of going out for a change, which was always a wonderful thing in Magnus’ opinion since Alec was rarely in mood for partying. And while the night started out great, Magnus wasn’t having fun anymore because he couldn’t find Alec.

Alec was nowhere to be seen, the last place Magnus saw his boyfriend was when a pretty tipsy Isabelle was dragging her brother over to the bar. It wasn’t like Alec to drink, but that night he went all out and was quite heavily intoxicated by that point, so it was only natural for Magnus to worry about the Shadowhunter’s whereabouts. Because he couldn’t find Alec at the bar, he decided to check out the dance floor and was quite surprised that he couldn’t find Alec, or any other Shadowhunter there. Well, where in the hell were they then?

Magnus felt both, angry and worried. The warlock’s anger was completely justified in his opinion; this was supposed to be the time he and Alec would spend some fun time together, but then Alec had to ruin that by suddenly disappearing. Still angry, Magnus returned back to the bar and ordered himself a glass of whiskey, emptying the glass almost immediately and then ordered himself another drink. As he held the glass in his hands, spinning it around a few times, his thoughts wandered of to Alec again and the warlock felt his heart grow heavy. It was the first for him to feel so lonely at Pandemonium. Just as he was about to completely give into his bad mood, someone tapped his shoulder. Magnus rolled his eyes and then turned around, to tell the person that was bothering him to get away, because he really wasn’t in the mood. However, as he turned around, he was pleasantly surprised to see Alec standing next to him.

“Alexander!” exclaimed Magnus happily and as he looked over his shoulder, he could see Jace and Izzy standing near Alec as well. “There you are, I’ve been looking all over for you. Where have you gone off to, angel?” asked the warlock, frowning when the only response he got was a drunken giggle from the hunter. Magnus saw that Alec was thinking about how to reply, but the only thing that his drunken state of mind focused on was being called an angel by Magnus.

“H-hello to you too, hot-hot stuff,” slurred Alec, Magnus raising an eyebrow and then he shook his head, because he realised Alec was totally out of it. Magnus was tempted to go yell at Isabelle and Jace for allowing Alec to consume that amount of alcohol, but then realised that it wouldn’t make any difference, since the other two were as drunk as Alec. Magnus looked over at Alec, who was supporting himself against the bar to not fall onto the floor, his sense of balance leaving his body a long time ago.

“Hot stuff?” asked Magnus with a chuckle and then got onto his feet, helping Alec to sit down. The Shadowhunter was about to say something back as a protest, but as the room started spinning around, he obeyed Magnus and sat down in peace. “Now then, Alexander,” started Magnus, but was interrupted by Alec.

Alec, whose rational way of thinking has left him a long time ago, was completely in awe as he continued to stare at Magnus’ handsome face. Wanting to impress the other, Alec put on a smirk, which he thought looked seductive, but in Magnus’ opinion his drunken smirk made him look kind of creepy. However, Magnus made no comment about it, his jaw dropping when Alec started talking again. “Did it hurt?” asked the hunter, slurring his words awfully and Magnus gave him a puzzled look.

“Did what hurt?”

“When you fell from heaven,” said Alec and waggled his eyebrows. In his opinion, he was on fire, just as was his flirting. With it, he was bound to impress the warlock. Magnus, on the other hand, couldn’t believe that Alec was trying out such cheesy pick up lines on him. Well, that just showed how drunk his boyfriend actually was and a little grin spread across his face.

“Darling, you know I’m part demon, so I can’t be from heaven,” joked Magnus and Alec perked up.

“Oh, oh, I have another!” said Alec when he remembered Jace teaching him one more pick up line earlier that day. “Are you from Tennessee, then?” asked Alec and Magnus only laughed, because Alec looked way too proud of himself. “Because you’re the only ten I see,” went on by saying Alec, thinking that he was smug, but because Magnus didn’t look quite impressed, Alec’s good mood faltered and he frowned. Maybe Magnus didn’t understand the line? “Get it, because I think you’re a ten. Like-like very good looking and hot,” explained Alec and Magnus chuckled.

Alec was too adorable to put it into words and Magnus slowly nodded. “I understand what you meant,” said Magnus and that was enough to satisfy Alec for the time being. “You look rather ravishing yourself, my dear,” said Magnus, accepting Alec’s little game of flirting and the hunter gave him a drunken giggle.

“Are you single?” blurted out Alec and Magnus burst into laughter. “We should go out.”

“Sorry to disappoint, but I’m not single,” said Magnus, shaking his head and tried his best not to laugh again.

“You aren’t?” asked Alec, his voice an octave higher and tears went into his eyes, because it wasn’t fair! He saw Magnus first and couldn’t believe that all of that hard work - flirting - went down the drain. As drunk as Alec was, he couldn’t really remember or realise that Magnus was talking about him. “It’s not fair!” whined Alec and tears rolled down his face. “Who are you dating? What’s their name?” demanded Alec to know as more tears wet his face.

“Alexander Lightwood,” replied Magnus with a grin and wiped some of the tears with the sleeve of his shirt.

“But that’s my name!” sniffled Alec and looked up, his hazel eyes finding Magnus’ golden ones. Because Alec still didn’t get the entire picture, his anger only worsened when he learned that that idiot had the same name as him. “He has the same name as me?” asked Alec and that was when Magnus couldn’t control his laughter anymore, laughing like crazy, which made Alec tear up again. He didn’t get it what was so funny!

“Oh, Alexander, you’re precious,” said Magnus, still laughing and when he finally stopped laughing, he placed a hand on top of his boyfriend’s one and shook his head. “Seriously, how many drinks did you have?” asked Magnus and Alec huffed under his breath.

“Not that many,” said Alec, swinging all the way back in his chair and then folded his arms on top of his chest. “Why do you care anyway?” asked the hunter, irritated. “Why don’t you go back to your stealing boyfriend of yours? Not only he stole you from me, but he stole my name as well,” said Alec and started planning a way to revenge himself.

“You’re being ridiculous, darling,” said Magnus and chuckled. “You must’ve had a lot of drinks if you can’t remember that you’re my boyfriend,” said the warlock then and chuckled when he saw how startled Alec looked.

“We’re dating?” asked Alec, slurring his words again and felt his stomach making a flip, feeling sick as hell, but decided to ignore that.

“Last time I checked, we were still dating, yes,” said Magnus and Alec gave him a drunken giggle.

“Awesome, I have such a hot boyfriend. Good job, me,” said Alec. Just as Magnus was about to say something, Alec suddenly got onto his legs and somehow managed to climb on top of the bar. With horror in his eyes, Magnus tried getting Alec off the bar, but because the other was too stubborn to listen, he casted a spell, which kept Alec in place on top of the bar. “Listen everyone!” yelled Alec on top of his lungs, attracting attention of some people near them. “This man right here, Magnus Bane, is mine,” announced Alec and Magnus looked away when he pointed on him. “I’ve got a hot boyfriend and we love each other. If someone tries to steal him away, I-I’ll fight you!”

“Alexander, get down,” said Magnus, his face red with embarrassment as more people started staring at the two of them.

“I need to let people know you’re mine. What if someone wants to steal you?” asked Alec, swaying on his feet and Magnus shook his head.

“No one wants to steal me. Now, get down, big guy.”

“But-”

“Alexander, people are staring. Listen to me and step down,” said Magnus, Alec in the end stepping down from the bar, his face pale as the sickness worsened. “Good boy. Are you feeling okay?”

“I think I’m gonna be sick,” whined Alec and Magnus sighed.

“Let’s get you home, angel,” said Magnus and created a portal, which took them straight to his apartment. While Alec spent throwing up for the rest of the night, Magnus was already having fun as he thought about how much teasing he was going to get from this when Alec would feel better.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading.  
> Comments and opinions are well appreciated :)


End file.
